Volume Two,  Lessons from the Road

Unexpected Magic

I can’t quite explain what motivated me to buy a ticket to Spain a few months ago. My brain will say it was because I have a friend who moved there and I wanted to visit. Or it’ll tell me that it was because I scored a really great price on airfare. Or I could attest that it was because I wanted to know if the moon and the stars really did look the same over on the other side of the world?

As I sit in the cramped seat aboard a Boeing 777 on my way back over the Atlantic, I think that the most logical answer is that I went to see a rainbow.

Faro, Portugal 3-10-24

Rainbows

I have always loved rainbows. Back in the 70’s I used to rock a rainbow 3/4 sleeve shirt that faded into hearts (all my 70s gals know what I’m talking about!) When I was 12 years old, I moved into a room with a huge rainbow painted across the pale blue walls. I loved that room where I lived out all my days of teenage angst. On my 48th birthday, 1 year after my divorce, a huge double rainbow danced across the sky, assuring me know that I was going to be okay…maybe even better than okay. (Read the story of The Rainbow Connection here).

And then there was the rainbow in Faro, Portugal on the day of the Pisces New Moon.

Rainbows are magnificent reminders that even in the darkest days, there is always hope for a more beautiful tomorrow.

Me and my fabulous rainbow room circa 1989

The Pisces Flow

You see, leading up to the New Moon, I had had what many would consider a rough start to my Spanish getaway: my flight to Spain was delayed 6 hours which robbed me of an afternoon of exploration in Madrid, my suitcase didn’t arrive in Spain until 3 days after I did, I forgot my phone & a new pair of shoes in the back of a blablacar (luckily, there were both retrieved), and of all the 360 sunny days in Southern Spain, I arrived with the rain. Oh, and that friend I came to visit? Well, he got sick.

And yet, I was there to honor the New Moon in Pisces, which is the dreamy water sign who invites us to surrender to the flow. I had ironically placed a sticker in my clear phone case just before leaving that says “go with the flow”

My phone case sticker

So that’s exactly what I did.

Gyspy Spirit

I may not have had my suitcase, but I did have my gypsy spirit of adventure with me and she was the one who alerted me to magic that was all around me in that charming Southern Spanish town called Huelva:

  • the scent of the orange blossoms that filled the air
  • the taste of fresh calamari & mussels from the sea
  • the white pigeons that were uinquely different from the ones we have here in the States
  • the Queens of Divine Feminine Power who were revered all over town
  • the custom of afternoon cervezas at a café with a friend or 6

When my friend told me that he needed a day of rest instead of day-tripping with me to Faro, Portugal, I was bummed to not have the time with him, but quickly reminded myself that joy is in the journey. I had traveled all the way around the world and wasn’t going to let anything steal that joy: not missing luggage, not illness, not rain.

Let’s just say that my day alone Faro, Portugal was one of the most unexpectedly magical days of my life! I loved every single second of that day! From the bus ride into town, to exploring the tile-stoned streets, to dancing on the dock, to finding my way into a “Pink Riders” motorcycle music festival, to eating delicous food from the sea, to sitting on the cathedral steps, to dancing in the rain, to bearing witness to one of the most spectacular rainbows of my life!! It was a day of splendor and beauty that was tailor-made for me.

Thank you Universe!

Healing

As I sat there watching the sunset that afternoon in Faro, listening to my Chiron Healing Playlist, unexpected tears rolled down my face. I don’t know exactly where they came from–the joy or the sadness or the bravery or the fear? All I know is that I was deeply and unexpectedly in need of time alone to cry and release all the pain that I’ve been carrying for the past several years and also a moment to acknowledge how far I’ve come (quite literally).

What I know for sure is that healing is a process. So is forgiveness. So is letting go.

And that’s why I love the moon so much- she reminds us that all of our feelings and life situations are all a phase, both the joy and the sorrow. So for me, in that moment when the rainbow burst forth from the rainy sky at sunset on the eve of the New Moon in Pisces, I realized that I was unexpectedly there, with that rainbow, to close the final door on my 30-year love story with my ex-husband.

After that day, I knew I had to make my way back to Madrid to visit a woman.

Figura en una finestra, by Salvador Dali- 1925

The Woman in the Window

Inside the Reina Sofia Museum in Madrid there is a 1925 painting by Salvador called “Figura en una finestra“. I had first seen her 25 years prior and was so moved by her soft curves, teal colors and deep longing for the sea that I bought a print which I later framed for my (then) husband’s birthday.

The Woman in the Window hung in our bedroom during our 20-year marriage. Everyday I would wake to see her looking out that window, imagining all the adventures that were yet to be. It was just last year, when I moved into my own home, that I gave her away.

As I stood before her in the Reina Sofia, once again unexpected tears streamed down my face. Maybe this woman felt trapped insder her home and that’s why she’s looking so longingly at the sea outside her window? Maybe she is me.

But now I’m free.

Now I’m free to be courageously, authentically me. I’m free to buy a plane ticket to Spain on a whim to see a rainbow. I’m free to dance on the dock in Faro, Portugal with the music of Amos Lee’s Dreamland filling my soul. I’m free to meander into a Pink Rider’s Bike rally to hear the most souful portuguese voice fill the old cathedral with reverent sound. I’m free to write my story any way I choose and to share it with others in hope that it will ignite a spark of inspiration for them and their healing journey.

Freedom is what awaits you on the other side of divorce, on the other side of grief.

The Magic Question by Fia: theme song for my day with the rainbow

How does it get any better than this?

So if a painting makes you cry, or the smell of orange blossoms make you weep with joy or the feel of the sun on your face and birds siging in the air fill you with hope, know that you’re seeking out the magic.

From the catastrophic to the mundane, we are all author’s of our own life’s story. How do you want yours to play out?

Me, I’ll take trips accross the world to experience a rainbow anyday.

Namaste

One Comment

  • Kelly MCCarthy

    Beautiful post, my friend. I’m envisioning dancing on a dock alongside you as we let go of the past and embrace what is reaching out to embrace us. I’m so proud of you and can feel your freedom through your exquisite words and lived experiences…

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